bella, i have always loved u.i may not physical,
i will always love u.
i cant deny that.
i can never ever deny the fact that you are the girl that i love so much.
you may say that you are not beautiful, sweet, cute,etc,
but to me you are forever are.
and there are other qualities that shines.
it may not be physical but something that lies within.
you may not realise but it's the fact.
im just missing you greatly right now.
and the thoughts of you leaving me is back.
the insecurities is here.
i cant do anything right now.
everything now is in your hands.
i guess its too late to say anything.
bye.tc.

why are the past bugging me?
where are the words to start anew?
i've succeeded to turn over a new leaf like finally.
but, someone obviously dont think so.
its just so heartbreaking when the words come from the one you love dearly.
its like smashing a glass pane with a construction hammer.
what should i do?
what should i do other than to prove that i've changed?
i know that's not enough.it's never enough.
when i told her the truth, she cant accept it but she want to know about it.
i just dont understand.
if i kept it as a secret, we quarrel.and if i dont, we quarrel too.
what should i do?
im lost..
everything dawns to me that what happens in this relationship are all my fault.
yes, i know that.bt aren't i making use of this chance to prove that im unlike before?
way unlike before.
nvm,if u already chose to give up on this relationship because of me,
just go ahead.
'let me bear all the pain.im ready to face it.
though its painful.
i have to accpt the consequences.
no running away.

what have i done wrong?
yes, i was with my friends.i replied late.
im sorry.but why musnt i cntct u till u cntct me?
isnt that too harsh??
at least when we pause, we still cntct each other.
sigh.
pls tell me straight if i have done wrong.
you never wanted to tell me anything.
sigh.
how i hope to be a better listening ear.
i just felt not up to your standard.
am i not a good boyfriend?
what more should i do?
when she talked about norfi in her blog, i was shooting up.
and that shows she still cntct him.isit?
just tell the truth.
i dont want to wait anymore. i want to go on.
i want to move.
i want us to move together.
move together as a whole.

nothing much to blog about actually...

but, nvm..i will just blog..

1)analogue electronics.

my module for monday,7/7/08.

facilitator:Ranjit singh.(a singh witouht a turban and talks with an accent)

-he talks with the real, original indian accent.

-and i think, since he took off his turban, his head started turning bald.

----and its true....

-but too bad, he's the SEG head.

-nothing that we can do to outpower him.just be patient in his class.

his class was alwats serious..not much joke.

BORING~

2)Relationship with bella(salbiah).

i dont know what kak nor going to do.

but if she ever tries to talk bella around, i am not just gonna stay put.

for sure, im going to meet her and tell her to express all her dislike about me straight to my face.

i just hate hypocrite!!!!

they are the worst creature, worst than an animal's way of handling situation.

for the time being, hope that bella gonna stay put to me, and never to be part away from her.

it's going to kill me.

i'll just hope that you not ging to listen what she says.

______________________________________________________

F**k ppl who dislikes me.

you cant judge me from what you see if you dont know me.

bee-yatch.

dont ponder on the past.

people change like you do.

haha..look urself in the mirror.

correct urself before you interfere into peopl's life.

i know she's your sister but you cant control her like your mum.

TB..which means Too Bad.

and TC..and im sure you all know what it means.

____________________________________________________

we finally patched up.
and leave that guy.
im happy.
all my tears are worth it.
hmm..
i love u.

we finally patched up.

1st july 08.
the worst day of my life.
2nd july 08.
the happiest day of my life.
its worth the tears.

1st july 2008.
the day that im once again single.
unexpected right?
she want to let go 7 days before our first year.
argh!!!!!!!!!!

belle, i am wondering what state are we in now..
everything seems unclear now.
you are unlike before.
i didnt get the attention that i used to have.
if you really wanna me to change and be strong for us, that is all that i am asking for.
i need your support, i need the motivation from you.
i am 90% done..10% more.
belle, prove to me you are the one.to me, you are the one and you just have to prove it.

i love you.i miss you.i need you.
u promised to be with me through thick and thin.
prove it,