im damn useless.
i dunnoe y.
its just dat i feel useless and helpless.
everything is cramping in my brains and killing my brain cells.
haiz.
nvm.

i got no mood to blog right now.
there's somethng that kills me inside.
i'm not sure.
but i'm sure this is a slow death.

Labels: moodless

met her again today.
after UT, i left school and went to meet her.
we then went to the movies.
Watched Alvin and the chipmunks.
it was hilarious.
and the chipmunks-CUTE!!!!
haha.
and they can sing.
add to their cute factor.

and other things went on.

i justt had a great day by torturing her on her first day of mensuration.
im sorry.

and finally,
when we were waiting for the bus to send me home.
she cried.
and before i boarded the bus, i actually cried.
fortunately, she didnt see it.

PHEW!!!

i sent my hp today.
i will get it back on friday.
but that is not confirmed.
if i were to be bankrupt, i will delay my hp collection.
haha.

but at least im happy.
i love you.
muackz.

as a ALLAH's khalifah, i have failed to do what is supposed to be done.
i did not abide by HIS rules and regulations.
i am a failure.
i am damned.

now, i feel as though i am losing everything in life.
my family, relationships and etc.

its just 1 way now.
to start abiding HIS rules and do what i supposed to be done as a khalifah
.......................................................................................

yesterday night, i am crying for the whole night and doesn't have a good night sleep.
i just keep thinking about her.
her words that what was said.
it touches my heart.
and 1 of them is this 'syg syg syg.......syg syg syg......syg syg syg?'
i finally got what is meant.

and for now i just couldnt msg her anymore.
for 1 week.
my hp is spoilt and no money to repair and buy a new 1.
its all due to the late pay check.
its frustrating.

it feels like hell.
i feel empty and emo without her.
the feeling is like being murdered but worse than it.
it is just undescribable.
...................................................................................

to:bibi.

i am fine.
my whole day is great.
i ate sandwhich for lunch in school.
i miss u.
how i long to meet u.
haiz.
but..nvm.
i uunderstand truly.

hope you are fine without me by your side.
just remember that i always remember you.
and loving you.
muacks.

today is a very suay day for me..
1st . my hp is a gone case.
to add to my misery,
warranty card is gone.
im so depressed ryte now.
dont feel like doing anything.
2nd, my laptop is down.
i just cant connect to the wireless network.
im so stressed.


now i cant contact her for a week or so.
it makes me more depressed.
it feels like hell.
she already starts work and cant possibly meet her.
and nw , i cant contact her.
double the PRESSURE!!!!!!!!
haiz.



I LOVE U!!
I MISS U!!

just wanna let u noe that i am crying while typing the above.
MUACKS!!!

today was an extremely great day.
it was exceptionally CHAOTIC.
i cant keep my hands to myself and just wanted to touch, hug, and make her happy.
and panic at some point of time.

and today is the day i will treasure our relationship.

just finish RJ-ing.
the question kinda lame.
question: describe yourself in a sentence.
but i just anyhow put in an answer to describe myself.

btw today is fun.
feel rejuvenated after meeting the BRAINees after a long time.
its like after soooooo long.
haha.

went to KFC and munch our dinners.
not to forget jokes.
but this time more into sexual content.
it starts after NAD's said 'MUM, I WANT TO PLAY DOWNSTAIRS'
wen translate, it sounds kinda wrong.
'MAK, kite nk MAIN bawah'
haha.

and i too MADE A grave mistake by saying ORGY which is supposed to be AGONY.
damn.
haiz.

btw on my way home, i twisted my thumb.
its painful.
its VERY VERY VERY painful and it hurts till now.

i think i need to apply ointment now.
so..
BYE AND GOOD NYTEZZZZ.

spent my boring day with my precious.
hehe.
but after meeting her, my day tooka turn.
she brightens me up.
YEZZA.
I LOVE U.

btw nw MSN-ing fyan.
told me all the tension that was brought up.
i could just look and shake my head.
what is GOING ON HERE???

WHERE'S THE BRAINEE FAMILY??????

sometimes i just dont understand.
and just dont bother to as i dont want to be implicated in this misunderstanding.
haiz..


looks like i have to just SIT BACK AND ENJOY THE FREE SHOW in front of me now.
and looks what happens next.

CHAOZ.

she's back.
a little relief for now.
i just felt happy when she's back.at least i dont feel empty.
she's the one that makes me full.
love U.

btw school is really BORING me.
the TOPIC about schools tires my BRAIN CELLS.
my PANTAT brain is stressed but shows no sign of DECREASING(in terms of size).
haha.

actually, i miss the days when people called me PANTAT.
haha.