after 1 month and 20 days,
i am leaving her for the first time.

she is having her O's this year.
it is good to leave her so as to give her space to study
n be better prepared for her O's.

i am kinda sad.
i kept thinking her day and night.
she kept appearing in my yes.
my heart feels empty without her .
how i wish she could be beside me all the tim.
this is the weirdest feeling i have ever experienced.
damn~





love u my precious.

Labels: leaving my precious

juz wanna edit previous entry.

MY SIS WEIGHT IS 45kg.
and to add..
3. KAK SHIDA.

she is the one sacrificing herself to donate her kidney to my sis.
thanks a lot.
hope u r ok now..

THANKS.

since i got nothing to do and feeling so bored,
i decided to blog about my family's sacrifice for my sick sis.



1. my dad

he did all he can to earn money to support my sis weekly appointment.
1 appointment is so expensive.haiz.
he actually turned into a PART TIME RAG-AND-BONE man.
i do help too when i am not bz, which is usually on weekends.
at first, i do feel embarrassed but as time passes, i finally thought that there is nothing to be embarrased about as you are not stealing someone's property.

2. my mum

she tried her best to cook sumptous food yet healthy food for my sis. for the first time, i saw my mum opening a cookbook to cook.
its soo not her.
but unfortunately, my sis had gained so much weight.
a 160cm girl.
once a 38kg, now a 53kg.
so much weight gained.

Labels: FAMILY

THIS IS MY THEORY ABOUT GIRLS.




i do not think i need to explain the above.
you can read the above yourself and intepret it.
i know there are a whole lot of you that agree with me.
haha.

thursday is the last day for me to be together with all of you, perhaps for everyone in the class.
but the 17 of you are going to meet up for BBQ without me.
haiz.
aniwaes, thanks for everything that all of you had done. appreciate it lotz.
no amount of words can describe my feelings to LEAVE the class after being
together for 16 weeks.
we did almost everything together, like during breaks and even toilet trips (LADIES ONLY).

dats all i suppose.
enjoy your BBQ.

from the bottom of my heart ....
THANK YOU AND LOVE YOU.

esp my first dae frenz: SUFYAN,SONIKA,SHAHIRAH & KHALID.
my first week frenz: SUFYAN(again!?),MASTURAH & NADIA.
my W35c NORM-doers frenz: SONIKA, MASTURAH, NADIA, HUI YING, HUI ZHI,
CATHERINE,JACINTHA,CHEK HAN, JONATHAN, TERENCE, SUFYAN.

and once again.....
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
may our friendship never dies.

Labels: BUBBYE MY BELOVED W35C

I DONT KNOW WHY..
BUT I JUST FELT LIKE KEEPING QUIET.
I NO LONGER FEEL THE NEED TO TALK.
MY MOUTH IS HEAVY TO OPEN AND EXPRESS MY CONCERN.
BUT I AM OK.
THIS IS ME.
90% OF THIS WEEK IS ME.

THE REAL ME AND I MEAN IT.

DONT ASK ME WHY.

BECAUSE I AM GETTING MYSELF.

I JUST WANT TO BE NORMAL.

Labels: IM PERFECTLY FINE

i dont know what happens to me today.
the painful memories that i experienced 11 years ago returned.
it was triggered after hearing someone's sarcastic remark.
time and again he repeats it.
but i understand his feelings.

i experinced a whole lot of verbal abuse.
it was like since i was in P1 -P6.
since pri 1, i was called a fatso and suay.
this all happens when i pri 1, my team lost in an event.
we got forth.
hais.

and in primary school i dont really talk.
and my primary school 'friends' would call me 'gemok bisu'
i would ignore what they say.
and they will continue to taunt me with abusive words.
i shall not type it.
this goes on and i never reveal it to anyone.
i am only exposing it now.haiz.

nvm.
6 years of primary school is HELL as i am very fat or obese.
and get verbally abused and bullied.

and everytime this painful memories returns, i would walk or spend my time alone.

how i hope i can be anti-social again and shut my mouth.
ignore everything that's happening around me.

Labels: painful memories returns

haiz..
what has happened to the world?
are they blind to see that i am not chinese?
it's because almost everywhere i go, people who are both chinese and malay thought i am
a chinese.
today when i was walking towards CCK MRT, a malay/muslim man approached me for a donation in a ticket form. it was $2.
nvm aboout that.
ok here it goes....
'hi,we are collecting funds for the needy' he starts.
'yea, ok but i dont hav money right now' i replied.
'ok, sorry' he ends with a disappointed tone.
'its ok, assalamualaikum' i replied.
'waalaikumsalam,YOU MALAY?' he asked.
'yeaps, y?'
'you dont look like a malay'
i smiled and walked away.
and that guy was obviously a malay/muslim.

another incident happens at the same place.
a young charming lady was looking around.
but she got no fat legs.
and when she saw me, she said that she was doing a survey on gambling.
i said ok willingly.
but after asking my name...
'you are not a chinese is it?'
'nope im not' i replied.
'oh ok, sorry for taking up your time' she says
'no surveys?i thought u had 1?' i asked.
' we are actually doing a survey on the same topic but only CHINESE can answer the questions'
haiz..

am i not tanned enough to be a malay or even a javanese???????

nvm ..
back again...
i saw a NYP student in the MRT.
she probably just finished a water activity.
because she was carrying a life jacket.
haha.
she has fat legs with a NICE body.
damn~.
i was standing in between the cabin and she was at the door facing me.
i was as usual listening to metal songs.
as i was listening not even paying attetion towards that girl.
suddenly, when i turned my head she was beside me, smiling sheepishly.
i was like shocked for a while.
i pulled out my earpiece.
i greeted her.
she then intro herself.
she's GERALDINE,17,NYP student,MECHANICAL ENGINEERING,KAYAKING is her favourite pastime.....
i then intro myself too.
she then asked for my number.
i was like over the moon.
haha
but stupidity or 'TRUTH' is on my side.
i replied' yeap sure but im attached'
her facial expression changes and walked away with her heads down.
how i wished i never say those WORDS.

Labels: am i CHINESE?????

well...HELLO readers...
today i am going to blog about what i see in the MRT.
firstly, i am going to tell you that i am dead as i left my earpiece in MAST's bag.
DAMN~
and i was so bored without my earpiece while in the MRT on my way home.
ARGH!!!!!!

nevermind....
and when i have no earpiece without me, i just had to look at peeople in the MRT.
haiz.

i shall begin now with what i see to day on my way back home.

it happened at PAYA LEBAR station.
a cute small girl alighted from the MRT with her family,
as she was walking, she was also looking inside the cabin that i was in.
as i was smiling to myself (im nt crazy),
she waved at me and smiled happily.
i also waved back to her, smiled and sticked out my tongue.
she was really cute.
should have taken her picture.
but too bad.
i dont have it.

next happens when i am at OUTRAM PARK.
a malay family boarded the train.
and they have a baby in a trolley.
they baby was really cute.
and he's a boy.
and he YAWNS.
he yawns till his mouth wants to tear.
haha.
when he yawns, he covers his mouth and with the same hand, he scratches his head.
and he looks extremely cute with his small face.

as i was slacking in the train,
4 french internationals, boarded the train.
2 female and 2 male.
and the male was unGENTLE.
they sat down wherelse they female had to stand.
pity the ladies.
and 1 of the guys imitate the station's name.
haha.
its quite funny when they say with their accent.
haha.

dats all folks.

SUFYAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IM NOT WEIRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
but nevermind.....




Rules:
Each player starts off the game by giving 6 weird things about themselves. People who get tagged needs to write in a blog of their own 6 weird things about themselves as well as stating the rules clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names.


so here i begins...

1) SUCKING MY TOE.

it is my hobby since i was 4. i dont know why i like to suck my toe, but its nice.
haha. it is so especially when i cant have my baby pillow beside me.
COOL!

2) SUCKING MY MUCUS.
this also my other hobby since i was 4. i like to have influenza so i can suck my mucus.
hehe.

3) SLEEPLESS
i am sleepless when i am in a vehicle. even in my dad's car and the public transport. no matter how long is the jorney, and short duration of my sleep the night before.

4) BASICALLY
this is my favourite word now. i dont know how and why it came out of my mouth but it just came out.

5) IRRITATE
this is again my favourite hobby. haha. especially when it comes to my friends.haha.
and my favourite target: SHARON.

6) IDIOTS
when i am with my secndary crazy frenz, we tend to talk with ppl we dont know and disturb them.haha.


the chosen 6 peeps:
1)atiqah
2)afifah
3)sharon
4)nadia
5)asiq
6)azmi

haha
happy blogging about your weirdness.